OH WHAT A MORNING!!!

Have you ever had a morning where nothing seemed to go quite right? This morning was one of those and oh, what a morning it was! Let's begin at the beginning - early, early this morning (4:55 a.m. to be exact) with the cry of my 9 week old son. That's right - he was ready for some food. So, I do as I always do and pop him out of the basinet and into my arms to nurse while I fall back asleep. As I was contemplating the time while drifting back into dreamland I realized that Rhett was going to be hungry again around 7 a.m. (right as I'm making last preparations for the day and getting kids prepared to leave for the sitters). But, that thought soon vanished as I fell asleep again. The alarm came oh too soon and I found myself hitting the snooze button three to many times. By the time I actually realized what I was doing it was 6 a.m. Panic set in and I jumped out of bed. Heading for the shower and glancing at myself in the bathroom mirror the realization that Rhett had just nursed on one side made me do a double take and in my mind I was thinking, "Oh crap," Will I have time to pump before I leave - not likely!! The next hour was a whirlwind of activity: showering, getting dressed, passifying Rhett (with 4 oz. of formula in his car seat while I finished getting Addison dressed and ready - don't judge!), and running around the house packing my lunch, Rhett's diaper bag, and all my school items (things I should have done the night before but was much too tired). Rhett finished his bottle just in time and without burping him (oops!) I stuck both kids in the car and we were off to Kristen's. We arrived at Kristen's a little behind schedule but nothing so drastic as to say that I was leaving them on the doorstep and running back to my car or anything. Instead I felt the need to chat and delay my lateness ever further. While there I realized that in my busyness this morning I neglected to remember to put Rhett's bottle in his diaper bag. Oh Joy! Now I need to call my husband and have him bring one to Kristen - not a huge deal though right? I hop back in my car around 7:50 a.m. (supposed to be at work by 8:00 a.m. - in Melba!) and say a nice little Christian curse under my breath as I realize the time for what it was - not only would I be late for work but I would also get ahold of Jeremy just in time for him to be arriving at work and the last thing he is going to want to do is go back home and grab a bottle. Luckily I make it to Melba with 7 min. until the bell rings - I quickly call Jeremy and he lovingly agrees to go back and get the bottle (love that man!) And then I realize that if I don't do something about my lopsidedness I'm going to be one hurting (or very wet) teacher in no time at all. This neglected breast has seen close to 9 hours with no nursing action and by golly it feels like it's going to explode. So, I take my handy dandy travel duel breastpump and head for the ladies restroom. That's right - I have to pump in a small ladies room. This room is about 5'x5' , one toilet, one sink and a small cabinet for womenly things. Not a very big space!! Anyways, at least there is an outlet and that's all I need. So, I get all of my equipment ready, expose myself to the chilly, stale air of this restroom, sit down on the toilet (no cover - apparently too much work) and try and get some relief. Well, you probably have guessed it by now but just as soon as I sit down the bell rings. At this point I don't care if my students have to wait a few extra minutes out in the cold, I have to express some of this milk NOW!! After I feel like the pressure has at least subsided and may at least last me until recess without any further leakage or lopsidedness I reluctantly begin putting away my things. I'm quickly trying to shove everything into the travel pack and wash my hands when I feel water dripping down my leg - I look on the toilet seat and notice that it's all wet. My first thought was oh great I just sat in urine and am going to smell like a toilet all day. No - actually my dress had been sitting IN the toilet while I was pumping and the bottom was soaked and running down my leg. At this point in the morning I just had to laugh because -seriously - it was funny! I did my best to squeeze as much toilet water out of my dress as possible, gather my things and head out the door to the lonely line of students standing out in the cold. Luckily none of them asked about the travel bag that I was carrying, or the reason behind the drips of water that followed me as I walked. Fortunately for me the rest of the day carried on without any major mishaps and I am able to laugh about the abnormal, crazy morning that I had. I'm sure some of you moms can relate and if any men end up reading this blog - I apologize for my bluntness but the story would just not be the same without the details. Hopefully next time you have a tough morning you can remember me and mentally put a picture in your head of me in a small bathroom, sitting on the toilet, fully exposed, expressing milk with my double breast pump and having my dress lazily float in the toilet water. Happy mornings to you all!!