God's will and Education!

Idaho's education has taken a financial hit this year and our school like many others are reeping the consequences of a fallen economy. Melba will be short $800,000 dollars next year in funding and we are one of the lucky ones in the valley. Some schools will be out millions. We are lucky enough to have put away some funds just in case this would happen and for that we are grateful. However, the school will be cutting back next year in staff and as a part-time kindergarten teacher whose position is no longer available next year I became extremely nervous and still am a little bit. We will be down at least one elementary teacher next year and with the new Luna laws it could be anyone goes - no matter if you have tenure or not. So - needless to say I'm uneasy about it!


 However, since March I've had an amazing sense of peace. I know that I'm am supposed to be a teacher, that is my gift and I truly love it! I have felt so blessed to be part of such an amazing community in Melba. I also feel so blessed that God provided me with an opportunity to stay in the community that I love and work part-time so that I could be home with my two small children during this stage of their lives.

Now I am facing another turn in the road of God's will for my life. I will be teaching in Melba full-time as a 2nd grade teacher come August. I never dreamed that I would be working for the majority of my life. In my perfect plan I would be able to stay home after having kids at least until the youngest was in school full-time and then maybe go back to teaching. However, circumstances never leant themselves for me to fullfill that dream. And so - I continued to teach and love it! Maybe God knew that my dream of staying home would not be one that would come to pass and so he gave me a severe love and desire for teaching. He knew that I would have to leave my children to the care of others (much to my dismay) while I spent the day with other children. There has been nothing more difficult on me than leaving my children in the care of others. Don't get me wrong - I greatly trust those that I have left them with - the problem lies with the fact that they don't love them like I do and I hate inconviencing people and taking advantage of their ability to stay home. It is definately the worst feeling a mother could have. Knowing that you can't give them the best (which is their own mother). So - at times I feel like a failure in that department, constantly wondering if there was any way that I could change circumstances so that I could stay home. I have been blessed the last 2 and 1/2 years to be able to work part-time as a kindergarten teacher. I've enjoyed this new journey and have felt so fortunate to be able to spend more time with my children. I was hoping that this situation would continue for a few more years so that I could be home with Rhett more often. However, this year there was not the overwhelming majority of kindergarteners that we had the past few years and so my position was terminated. I was devastated! My only option that remained in Melba was back to full-time, something I was hoping to put off for a few more years.

So - I weighed my options: Stay in Melba, go back full-time, secure a safe, fun learning environment for Addison OR try to find a part-time position in a different school admist the thousands of teachers clamoring for jobs in the valley. As I prayed about this decision I realized that God desired me to remain in Melba and I have to say that I was a bit relieved. My love for that community and the kids that I've taught is no secret. I want my children to receive their education in Melba and Addison will be a full-time first grader next year. I am at peace with where God wants me and I know that I am fortunate enough to have a job in education where I get extended vacations as well as the summer off - what could be better than that (other than home full-time!).

This summer will be spent preparing for my first year as a 2nd grade teacher as well as spending time with my children and family. I am so excited to see what God has in store for us this coming school year. I look forward to teaching and having Addison with me. And I know that God will supply a place for Rhett where he will be well cared for and loved. My heart does hurt when I realize that my time with Rhett will not be the same next year and for that I will shed many tears before August. But my peace that I am walking the path of God's will surpasses any doubts that I may have. Apparently there are quite a few cute little 2nd graders that need my love and guidance this year and so I am willing to give it - teaching brings me so much joy and for that I am grateful!

Lately . . . and Now!

Lately -

I haven't been motivated to blog - busyness, tiredness, stress, self-pity and worry are to blame.

I feel like I've been living in a fog - like a reality pergatory or something. Just unsure of the future, where I want to go and what I want to do and how I'm going to do it.

I've been contemplating a lot about life and God's will for mine.

I've been feeling unsettled and rarely want to spend a day at home - I want to move into a different house, preferrably in the country and feel free - I'm feeling claustrophobic in town and it's getting worse by the day. I'm yearning for a back porch to sit on in the evenings, drinking iced tea, watching the kids play in the yard and looking out for miles at nothing except maybe some wheat fields, grass and an occasional house in the distance. Ahhhhh - if only . . . . .

Now -

I think I'm slowly creeping out of this fog that I'm in and beginning to live each day to the fullest again - not wallowing in a pit of self-pity and frustration and worry.

I have a sink full of dishes, toys and unfolded laundry on the floor and instead of doing it I'm choosing to write this short blog and then probably take my kids on a walk on the greenbelt - regardless of the wind.

I'm trying to figure out how to be the healthiest I can be without becoming a fitness fanatic or health freak. I don't want that to control me either - I just want to live each day, making healthier choices, getting some form of exercise and treat food as a necessity for survival not a prescription for my boredom, depression, fears, social outings, etc . . . . .

I'm enjoying my children for the next 2 months before I dive back into a full-time job as a 2nd grade teacher.

I'm spending some time in the Bible and prayer each morning before the kids wake up and feeling refreshed and ready for the day prior to cartoons and cheerios.

I'm actively taking side roads when I'm driving in the country to see if any houses with property are for sale.

I'm going to begin blogging again more regularly!

Until then - - -

April

Of all of the months so far April has gone by the quickest - and the funny thing is that I can't quite put my finger on why. I was clearing off my April calendar at school yesterday and realizing how quickly it seemed to vanish. And as I sit here pondering just what it was that made it fly by so quickly I am struck with the reality that life is going by way too fast. Addison and Rhett are at such a ripe young age where their minds and their perceptions of their parents and of the world are being molded and I need to remember to tred this path carefully or else I could make some vital mistakes. I need to seize more "joy" moments in my parenting and "really" realize how quickly the time will pass before they are grown up. I want to cherish every minute of it and not be concerned or too preoccupied with my own desires or my "list" of things to do before I sit down with them and play a game, read or just talk with them. I'm going to try and blog my joy moments weekly with you because I need to find them. My friend Kristen records her joy moments weekly and I love reading it - and it makes me realize that so many joy moments happen each day - I just need to recognize them. So, I'm going to - I will record my joy moments as well!! So I can look back on this time when my kids are so young and remember what life was really like and the little things that I'm sure I will dearly miss all too soon!!!


Now that I went off on a random tangent I will get back to the things that were accomplised in April: Here goes!!

Addison begins soccer

We gave Addison a choice to play T-ball again this summer or try soccer. She decided that she wanted to attempt her luck on the soccer field and so far she loves it. She has yet to really grasp the concept of being aggressive but she runs her little tail off after that ball each and every game and it's so fun to watch her.



Movies:

Savannah Smiles is a movie that I remember watching when I was a little girl and I remember I LOVED it! So when I saw it at Target for $5.00 I snatched it up quick and was positive that Addison would love it as well. It was so fun watching it again!

Unstoppable was an intense movie - very entertaining! I have always liked Denzel Washington and his performance in this movie didn't disappoint.

Books:

The Hole in our Gospel - I finished it this month and was overwhemingly moved by it's pages - a must read for every Christian for sure!

At Home in Mitford - a story of a small town and it's interesting and colorful inhabitants. It is such a light, easy, uplifting read and I look forward to curling up with it and a cup of coffee almost every day to read about the goings on in Mitford.

Octave of Angels - I wanted to read this book because it was by the same author as the Mistmantle Chronicles that I loved so much. It was about a small town mystery in England and a yearly tradition called the Octave of Angels. It was a short sweet story about mystery, ancestry, faith and friendship.

Budget:

We made a budget and kept pretty close to it for the most part. I really messed up with the grocery budget and found myself out of money with 2 weeks left in April. It was eye opening to realize how much we spend on groceries each month and this month I'm going to have to really consider whether or not we actually NEED the things that I've been buying. I'm ready to give it another go this month and hopefully stay more within our budget range.

Pounds lost:

Now here is the real question and the answer is - much to everyone's surprise - Nothing!!! :( This month was extremely difficult in the weight department. I would try weight watchers for a few days and then I would run out of food and money to buy more weight watchers food and then call it quits. Then my weight watchers online trial ran out so I didn't have the use of all of the fancy tools and that was not motivational for me. Then I decided with 1 and 1/2 weeks left in the month that I would just go off sugar and starch and that should at least get me somewhere right? wrong!! In the 5 days that I did that diet I didn't lose more than .4 ounces. BOO!!! Needless to say I need to try something different. Jeremy and I began doing the 30 day Shred last week and so far have successfully done it for three days which is what we vowed to begin with. We said that we would start doing it 3 times a week and then start adding other stuff in or more 30 day shred. I feel good after I've done it but nothing is showing on the scale. It's been frustrating and with summer quickly approaching and our trip to California looming to the forefront of our calendar I find myself discouraged. I wish this wasn't so difficult. So - all I can really do with a limited budget and no gym pass is to find a way to just eat better and exercise regularly. I'm hoping that if I establish a fairly consistent exercise routine then I will be able to be a little more free with what I put into my mouth. So with no real definate plan I hope to lose close to 8 pounds this month through exercise and eating right. That's 2 pounds a week - I can do it!!!

Craft:

Easter Egg decor

You can't get through the Easter season without dying some Easter eggs - the kids loved it!

Recipes Tried:

It wasn't until late in the month that I remember about my monthly goal of fixing something new and by the time I remember we had no money left in the budget to purchase any of the ingredients - so - maybe next month!

April Others:

We enjoyed a nice visit from our dear friends the Pucketts at the beginning of the month. It was such a joy to see them again and visit with them. I still mourn their loss almost daily and hopefully someday they will be back in this area. Until then, we will make the most of the time that they are here visiting.

Addie missed Eli tremendously!

Friends - nothing quite like them in the world!!

Rainy Days: There were plenty to chose from!

Jumping in puddles is a must for Rhett so when it's rainy and we go out, the rainboots must come along. It's useless telling him no because to him any punishment is worth jumping in a few puddles.

Fun things to do on a rainy day:

Addison loves to play birthday and so she gets giftbags and fills them with toys from Rhett's room and then he comes out and opens his gifts - acting like he would if he was getting it for the very first time. It's a great game that they love to play.

Jumpin Jungle!! We had the place to ourselves for nearly 20 min. Then just two other little boys for a full hour - it was awesome!! The kids LOVED it!

Another one of Addison's favorite things to do if play library in our office. She has us reserve books and then brings them to us with numbers on sticky notes written on them. Too cute!! As I was walking past the office one day I noticed this sign on the door.

Transfering our Garden to the other side of the house and replanting raspberries and strawberries. The kids LOVED to help! much to daddy's frustration at times - it was kinda funny!

Many hours of Jake and the Neverland Pirates while the rain poured outside:

Elementary Carnival at Melba: The Wild West - soooo much fun!

Eggstravaganza at the church:

Children's program at the church:

Addison: "The green inside my basket reminds me of the palms that lay across the ground for Jesus for his parade one day." - She did great!

 Apart from telling the children to be quiet or he would kill them Rhett did a pretty decent job behaving during the Easter program. (I really don't know where he learned that - honestly!)

Easter:

Very busy day for us with both of our families being in town. We spent the morning at church then went to my aunt Lollie's house and spent time with my parents and her side of the family. We had a nice dinner and an extremely large egg hunt for the kids. Then we went to Jeremy's parents and hung out as well as having another egg hunt. It was a lot of fun!! A great day to celebrate the resurrection of our Saviour.

Cousins and best friends end up with the exact same Easter dress. No - it was not planned!! Too funny!

SNOW!! April 29th???? Really/?

I'm looking forward to May - it's warmer weather and fun activities!! And the end of school - hurray!!!