Addison's Birthday

So - for Addison's birthday this year she had a Candyland party. I was super excited when she came up with this idea last January! So, all year long I had been looking for ideas and I came across so stinkin many! However, our budget lacked the funds to create such a spectacular display as the "bloggers" I had come across. That and the lack of time for any extremely creative things. I had these grandios plans of how to decorate and the games we would play - but, her birthday party came and went with little else then a small game of "real" Candyland and Addison's made up version of duck, duck, goose (gumball, gumball, lollipop). Needless to say I was disappointed in myself but soon realized that Addison had a blast and that is all that matters. I guess I would have been more disappointed if I had planned a huge party with lots of fun games because only a few of Addie's friends could make it to the party. Poor girl was born at a terrible time of year to have a birthday :(

We decided to have her friend birthday party in the afternoon and then her family party that evening. She got to have her cousin Kenna spend the night which is one of her favorite things. It was a good day!

Invitations to Addison's party

My big "little" girl

Candyland birthday cake - Grandma Nancy made it for Addison!

getting ready to eat cupcakes!

"Happy Birthday to You"

The Party Gang

Candy display

Helping herself!

She finally got a Leapster!

Advent days 6 - 10

Our Advent activities for day 6 - 10:


Day 6 - Go see the Living Christmas Tree at College Church - so good!! Addison said that she loved it and hopes to go again next year. When I asked her what her favorite part was she said that it was the coffee shop skit. I thought for sure she would say the Christmas tree lights.
Day 7 - Color Christmas pictures out of a new coloring book and have hot cocoa with marshmellows
Day 8 - Build a Snowman stickers
Day 9 - Make a gingerbread house as a family
Day 10 - Have a playdate with aunt tee-tee

Advent - The first 5 days

I have to admit - I LOVE the idea of Advent and slowing down to appreciate the real meaning of Christmas and making opportunities for fun family memories - HOWEVER, realistically it's really difficult. Working part-time, getting things for Christmas and Addie's birthday organized has left us little time to celebrate Advent. But I haven't completely failed - for the most part we've done every days activity to some degree. It's all I can do! Here is the a list of our first five days activities:

Day 1 - make a Christmas countdown chain
Day 2 - purchase a Christmas tree and decorate it as a family
Day 3 - make a nativity ornament
Day 4 - put on new Christmas socks and read Christmas stories
Day 5 - make a nativity snowglobe and go sledding at grandma's

The Season of Advent

Last year was my first year really diving into the Advent season and making the most of Christmas and the real reason that we celebrate it. I had a lot of fun and look forward to enjoying it again this year with my family. Every day we read a bible verse (or two or three), have an activity for that day and unwrap a Christmas book to read. Last year my daughter, Addison decided that she loved the Christmas books and read them all within the first few days of December and then didn't want anything to do with them. This year I wrapped them up and she can unwrap one a day - that way they will last all season. She is so excited!! I also wrapped up a few new ones as well so that will be a fun surprise.

I look forward to blogging our advent activities. I may do three days at a time due to the time it takes to create a blog post (our computer is acting up). I look forward to the memories that we will create as a family.

Volleyball

Since I was in junior high and was introduced to the game of volleyball I was forever hooked. I enjoyed serving and hitting hard and it felt so good to be a part of a team. I enjoyed it so much that as a junior in high school I began thinking of college volleyball. I however knew that my love for volleyball was much more than hitting and serving hard - it was about a team that has been together since 7th grade, it was about having fun with your friends and rejoicing in our accomplishments - I LOVED that! It became evidently clear while watching a volleyball match at NNU my senior year that being a part of a college volleyball team was going to be much different and I wasn't sure that I wanted to be transferred from an outside hitter to a defensive specialist because let's face it - I lacked the adequate height for a front row player in college. It would have taken too much of my time and I was looking forward to the social aspect of college and then there was the fact that I was going to be a part of a team that I had not even met - any of them! That was scary as an 18 year old. So - I decided against it and I have not regretted my decision.

I did however miss the game of volleyball and when I was given the opportunity to coach volleyball in Melba at the high school level I jumped on the chance. I coached for 4 years! Two years with the freshman team and then 2 years with the junior varsity team. I had a blast!! High school volleyball is what I remembered and loved and I got to coach in a small town just like I grew up in.

Once Addison was born I coached for one more year and then decided to take a break due to the time consumption of the sport and it not really fitting in with my schedule as a mom. However, last spring I got the itch to coach again, asked about it and was offered the job as the freshman coach. I was so excited at first, ready to get back into this game that I loved so much! Little did I know that it was going to take a toll on my family. I had forgotten how much time it actually took to be committed to a team for a season. It's been tough!! Childcare has become a nightmare - Rhett is struggling with the sudden seperation from mommy - Addie has had to suffer through a few practices - Jer has had to play mom more than he would like to - and I have never felt so stretched in my life.

Now as I look back on the season it seems to have flown by so fast. I truly had a blast, I loved the girls on my team and was able to enjoy the game I have always loved. It was a lot of fun!! Our team finished in third place in the disctrict which was better than I expected and I was proud of them. I don't know if I will coach next year, even though it was super fun the time away from my kids was really difficult. And if I go back to teaching full-time then I will have enough on my plate.

I'm glad I got the chance to coach again. This game of volleyball will always hold a special place in my heart.

some girls on my team relaxing between games at a tournament

My Grandpa (Gramps)

Tuesday, November 9th, 2010 -


It seems a little ironic that as I tearfully finish a memorial blog for my grandma I get a call from my dad saying that grandpa is close to meeting up with her in heaven. It seems that once we realized that they were getting old - which wasn't that long ago we had conversations that went something like this, "if one of them passes away the other one won't be that far behind". And it has happened just like we assumed it would. They had been married for 60 years and after that marital connection is broken I guess the heart "really" breaks. Grandpa went severly downhill last Monday (the day grandma passed away) and has refused to eat or drink much. His spirit is fighting to be with grandma and his body is slowly giving in. He's ready and as much as we selfishly want him to stay with us we know that it would be best for him to join grams in heaven. Oh she must be so excited right now - I'm sure she is so ready to here him talk again and enjoy the loving warmth of his hugs. They will have so much to talk about - I wish I could be there to witness it.


I can hopefully make it tonight to see him before he decides to leave. I was unable to say goodbye the way I wanted to grams and I hope that I can tell him that I love him one last time. He was special to me as well - it hurts all over again!!


Thursday, November 11th, 2010 -


I was able to go and sit with grandpa for a few hours on Tuesday night. I will never regret that decision! It was hard, very hard but I'm glad I did. Jeremy and I were fortunate enough to get a few minutes with him alone and it was special. I held his hand, watching his labored breathing and reminded myself of how strong he once was. He was my grandpa, my hero and in my eyes he could do anything! I told him that grandma was waiting for him and that it was o.k. to go and see her. Once my parents, aunt and sister arrived we sat there and talked about our favorite memories of grandpa. We had a few laughs and constantly talked to him like he could understand us (who knows - maybe he could). The hardest part of this was saying goodbye!! I was tempted to just get up and go - that would have been easier on my emotional state. However, I knew I would regret that. I stood up, I turned to look down into his sweet, handsome face that I have loved dearly all of my life and I told him how much I loved him, that I would miss him and to give grams a huge hug from me when he saw her. I hugged him three times, squeezed his hand, kissed his forehead twice, hesitantly left his room and cried all the way home. It hurts worse than before- two grandparents within two weeks is just not proper proticol for the grieving family members.


It is now Thursday and his body is still fighting to leave this earth. I've contimplated the idea of going back to see him again but I've already said goodbye once and it was one of the hardest things I've ever done. Do I really want to do that again? And do I really want to see him in worse condition?


Sunday, November 14th, 2010


Grandpa is hanging in there. His body is so strong and it's extremely sad that his mind isn't healthy because he could have had 5-10 more years left in him. His will to live we believe has been strengthened by the consistent presence of his daughters and family members who sit by his bedside. He has already had two attempts at slipping away only to restore his vitals when family arrives to bid him fairwell. What a determined, tough man he is!! I don't know whether he really knows what is happening - I wish I could talk to someone who has come out of dimensia but I know of no one. In that aspect it's been extremely difficult for my mom and her sister - just waiting!! no hope of him to survive more than a few days - waiting for the relief of death to take ahold of his earthly handicapped mind and transform it into the loving hands of his glorious heavenly father who is just waiting for him at the threshold - saying, "come home my son, come home to me, I need you here with me now, I have so much to show you and so much for you to do. Oh - and there is a baseball game in a few days and we need an extra player."

10:30 pm - Grandpa slips peacefully and willingly into the loving hands of his heavenly father - he never could resist a good baseball game. I knew this time would come and in the past few days I'll admit I was yearning for him to get to heaven  - however, getting the phone call and sensing that he is no longer on this earth hurts. The tears flow freely once again and I grieve for my loss, my grandpa, my hero and friend.

Friday, November 19th, 2010 -

Today we burried my grandpa, laid him to rest right next to grams. It was really weird being at the cemetary twice in a few weeks. The memorial service at the church was
 a perfect celebaration of his life. Josh Cremer played bluegrass on his fiddle (grandpa would have loved that) and Katie wrote and sang a song about my grandparents love story. It was perfect, titled "Come home". Their love story and life story is riddled with hardships and maybe someday I'll get the courage to write it - it would definately be a page turner. It was a great day to celebrate the life of my grandpa.

Tuesday, November 23rd, 2010 -

The shock of my grandparents passing has subsiding and is replaced with gratitude that they lived a full complete life and set such a great example for their family. I have an ebbing saddness that fills my mind constantly and they are missed every moment. Life has a funny way of healing grief. With a calm, refreshing snow, with the smile and laughter of my children, with the relentless love of a husband who has been such a huge support and help, and with the joy that the holidays will bring. Life continues for us on earth!

I will conclude this blog with a few of my favorite memories of my grandpa.

I remember:
1) the way he smelled when he hugged me.
2) his love for mochas - much to grandma's dismay
3) his quiet, gentle spirit
4) his insane love and protectivenss for grandma
5) the way he would act when grandma asked him to do something that he necessarily didn't want to do.
6)him always taking me to get dairy queen blizzards or shaved ice
7) the way he always thought I was beautiful, no matter what size I was or how I cut my hair
8) his love for John Wayne movies and Louie Lamour books
9) his support for my sporting events. Even though I lived in Grangeville he would travel to see me play volleyball, basketball and softball. He kept this tradition alive and even came to one of Addie's T-ball games this past summer.
10)him stealing extra dessert and trying his best to not let grandma see

I'll cherish these memories forever and I look forward to playing some baseball with him in heaven. I love you so much grandpa and feel so fortunate to have had you in my life.


 

The Rose Beyond the Wall

Jeremy and I received a lot of different sympathy cards from friends and family, all of which we greatly appreciated. I have always loved poetry and enjoy reading the different sayings that adorn each card, some of them a little cheezy and others very profound and enlightning. This poem called "The Rose Beyond the Wall" was in a sympathy card that Jeremy's grandmother sent to us. I loved it - so much that I thought I needed to blog about it - just in case the card got lost somehow in the cleaning phase of everyday life.

"The Rose Beyond the Wall"

Near a shady wall a rose once grew,

Budded and blossomed

in God's free light.

Watered and fed by morning dew,

Shedding its sweetness day and night.

As it grew and blossomed fair and tall

Slowly rising to loftier height,

It came to a crevice in the wall,

Through which there shone

a beam of light.

Onward it crept with added strength,

With never a thought of fear or pride

it followed the light

through the crevice-length,

And unfolded itself on the other side.

The light, the dew, the broadening view,

Were found the same

as they were before;

And it lost itself in beauties new,

Breathing its fragrance more and more.

Shall claim of death

cause us to grieve,

And make our courage faint or fall?

Nay, let us faith and hope receive -

The rose still grows beyond the wall . . .

Scattering fragrance far and wide,

Just as it did in days of yore,

Just as it did on the other side,

Just as it will forevermore.

This poem was perfect for me. Perfect because it put a beautiful picture in my mind of where my grandma is and what she is doing. It also was perfect because it reminded me of something grandma would sent someone who was grieving. It sounded like her!!